We live in a world where it is not acceptable to ask your family for money but it is deemed okay to ask a stranger.

We are extremely willing to hop down to the bank and get ourselves into deeper financial trouble but would never even dare to ask our own relatives. I make this observation as the time approaches for me to secure financial backing in time for university. Some people are more willing to swallow their pride and would seek help from family over major issues whilst others cannot even bear to think about it. However, here is why students should most certainly not feel ashamed of asking for help to pay for their tuition fees.

Firstly, university/college is so expensive! In the UK, the cost has risen so dramatically with the increase from £3000 a year to £9000. Now while the cost is great, the government managed to push it through on the basis that students will not have to pay for their tuition upfront. Apart from the fact that recent reports have suggested that the government may not make any money out of this scheme, there are certain people who cannot take out a loan under this system due to religious reasons on interest or perhaps because of other circumstances.
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Secondly, we are students. Plain and simple, the most we have been working for is 2-3 years before university alongside our studies so how can we be expected to cough up nine thousand pounds all on our own?

Thirdly, the same logic can be applied to our parents. Naturally, the first people we would ask for help are them but not all parents can afford to pay £9,000 a year for each of their children. Those who are able, are certainly very lucky. So hence, students should be met with helping hands when they look towards society for financial aid.

Fourthly, bursaries and grants are not as abundant as they are made out to be. Of course, we research and find any that are on offer but this means the competition is very fierce. Furthermore, what if you are a student who did not achieve such high grades at A-level? Usually these scholarships and grants are performance based so if you don’t have the grades, you aren’t offered any hope.

Fifthly, if you are a student and ask for help from people, it is not something to be ashamed of. It shows you are attempting to rise above the challenges you face and that you are not giving up. Remember, you’re asking for money for something good, your education and future. You are asking because you don’t want to fail, not because you need to be dug out of the failure pit.

I think that people who are approached for help need to realise this too. The teenager you see in front of you is one who has gone against the stereotype by not giving up, are you going to be the one who now tells him/her that they are chasing a hopeless dream?

Until Next Time

A Worried Student

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28 thoughts on “Is It Wrong To Ask For Money?

  1. There is absolutely no shame in asking for help. We are about to buy a home and we would ask family for a loan but sadly they are all just as poor as we are, lol. So we will be going to a lender, and I am not ashamed at all. 🙂

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  2. I see nothing wrong in asking others for help, however I am no good at doing this particular thing myself. I don’t ask my parents for financial help, and am even reticent to ask for their help with other things; probably because their response hasn’t always been a good one! So, as far as asking a complete stranger goes, no, I would never ask for their help.
    Whilst at uni my grandparents and boyfriend helped support me financially, and emotionally, without them I would have floundered! However, I did have to pay my own fees (my parents refused to). I did ask the bank for financial assistance when buying my first home, but other than that I’ve never asked anyone to help me financially in purchasing anything. To be honest, my boyfriend and I rely on one another (with financial responsibilities and so on), that’s just how it has always been! We have never had anyone else! I truly wish it could be different, even now, as no doubt with help from others, things would often be easier for us! At least we can say we did it on our own though, and can be proud of our own achievements and personal victories!!

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    • It is great you two have been able to support each other so successfully 🙂 you certainly can feel proud about your achievements 😀 The problem for me is I can’t just pop down to the bank either as they certainly will not be handing any money to an 18 year old!

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      • Thanks, yes, I feel we can 🙂 Nope, you can’t do that! I remember leaving uni and being told by a bank I couldn’t have something or another, because I didn’t have a credit reference score, as I had no credit to reference! It was a catch 22 – needed credit, but couldn’t get credit without credit – weird! You are better off with a student bank account or even asking a Credit Union for a low interest loan. Also the Student Union may have info on what students can access loan/grant wise. Otherwise, there is the student loan option?? People moan on about these, but they are unfortunately part of being a student. To be honest, for me the loan was the only real option. Yet, unless I decide to pay this off in bulk, I will never pay it off!! My student loan is a waste of time, the Government will never get the debt back (the interest accrued just eliminates any payment).I am sure that the loan system has changed though, look into it as an option.
        Hope you figure a solution soon!

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  3. I think some people confuse asking for help with the idea that needing help is the same thing as simply expecting assistance. It’s a shame that much public discourse is devoted to demeaning those who need help to handle pressing needs like food, healthcare, and education. Students work hard to get their education, it should not be impossible for them to achieve it affordably.
    I agree with you that there should be no shame at all in asking for assistance. If the “big wigs” were more concerned with making our society fair, just, and equitable they would look at some of the insuperable barriers put in place to deny people a quality education, affordable health care, and a living wage and they would see that this is detrimental to the social order. But the idea of “society” has been demeaned in the last thirty years (I’m not going to name names from either side of the pond) and I think this has contributed greatly to this problem.

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    • True. There is always that argument that helping creates a dependency culture but the fact is, students shouldn’t have to be paying so much for education and those in need of healthcare did not go outside knowing they will get injured or ill.

      True, society has become very atomistic, everyone is confined to their individual lives.

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      • I think it’s unfortunate the word help has negative connotations when it comes to public goods, like education. But some people do think that the profit principle is more important than affordability. Of course, as a student myself (and as an educator) I don’t agree with that.

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  4. There is no shame there,asking for help from family or the bank or where ever. The real shame is education having to be that expensive. I’m very sure there were people who couldn’t really afford £3000 now they just have no hope. I really hope you will be able to raise the money without too much stress…..Good luck!

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  5. I worked my way through college, like you are. I also had a loan from my state which I had to repay within 5 years. I did. It was worth the extra interest $ to help me become a teacher. Don’t give up and don’t give in!

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  6. No shame in debt but if your expense has tripled in one year, it is worth approaching relatives for a low or no-interest private loan before going to a lender. Explain to them in real terms what this tripling of tuition means–how much more money, how many years to pay it back to a lender, how much more it will cost at lenders’ rates. Once you do, they may understand that you are facing a situation VERY different to what they did when they went to school.
    Tuition room and board at private schools here in the U.S. are up to around $50,000 a year (about 29,000 British pounds). Even state-sponsored schools are about $15,000 to $25,000 a year. There are graduates who are in so much debt that they may never be able to move out of their parents’ homes until they’re 50, let along buy a house or get married, have children, etc. Some people say that the students are whingers but when you do the math, you see that it’s impossible to put yourself through school by working a part-time and summer holiday job anymore. Those who do try are the most likely to drop out of university.
    GOOD LUCK! Maybe you can paint to earn a little money–joke!

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    • Yup that is what I am planning to do and hopefully some will respond
      Definitely, we teenagers and students may complain alot but most of it is worth complaining about!

      Haha! That is a possibility 😛
      Thank you 🙂

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  7. You know in my observations this can be a cultural issue; I myself fall under the umbrella of your blog, I was programmed not to ask for money it was deemed rude or impolite. However I have met a variety of people along the way and there are cultures Latin, Afghan and Indian, the extended family unit work together and with each other. Instead of borrowing money from a bank they often borrow from relatives and pay it back including interest, I know a Latin man who wanted to change his career path completely, he went to his family to discuss this and insure financial backing should anything go wrong.
    And so knowing that there are families who go over and above is inspiring to me, it sadly also balances all the people I’ve met who’s families wouldn’t help them make the most of their lives.
    NEVER be ashamed to ask for financial help, then NO ONE can ever say “well you didn’t ask me” this life is too short for regrets, if no one will help you make it happen, then by gum give it some welly and do it yourself…. Always wished I’d had the University/College experience –
    🙂

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    • Hmm yes I have realised this too, different cultures do have different attitudes to borrowing money from relatives.
      That is great and much better for the family as a whole as it also brings people together.
      Thank you for the words of encouragement, now I just need to convince my dad to help me ask people. Yup, that is the next challenge but I think he is slowly coming around!

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